When Was the Last Time You Made Yourself Laugh?

I just published a post on my SnapChat adventure the other day. Check it out. I hope it makes someone smile, laugh, and then focus on doing the same thing for themselves!

Allow Yourself to Just Be Free
Allow Yourself to Just Be Free

Love,

Natasha

Try This Today…

Fear over immediate threat is okay; it’s understandable. Anxiety is the build up of fear and frustration of the “what-ifs” and the “shoulda’s” which oftentimes are out of our control because the past we cannot revisit and fix, and the future hasn’t occurred. We’re in a state of limbo, dangling in a space that we cannot control. And many of us have control issues.

So rather than stress over this reality, which is unhealthy, we need to focus on letting go and letting things be as they are.

Breathe.

Noticing your breathing means you are aware of the now; you are present. Rest in being present. Don’t struggle straddling fences. Breathe.

“Take in each moment as it comes. Don’t focus on the time. Focus on the moment”. Those are words of wisdom from my aunt Debborah Foreman, and she’s never steered me wrong.

I would love to hear from you by the end of the day or even tomorrow with an update on how well you handled your stress today. Did it build or dissipate? Please share.

~Natasha L. Foreman
P.S. Thanks to sis Arleen for forwarding the image used that motivated me to share with all of you đź’—

I Don’t Know About You But Here’s My Plan For Today and This Year

I’m going to focus on today, today. What can I do, see, and be today? That is my focus.

If I have one foot in the past and one in the future, that means I’m straddling the present. If I’m straddling the present then all I can possibly do is take a dump on today or choose to move both of my feet into today’s space. I don’t know about you but I’m tired of dumping on my present. I want to thrive each day. I want to wake excited about what the day will bring, and I want to fall asleep at night pleased with all that I experienced, learned, and shared that day.

I want my life to be about healing reflection not regret. I want to make the most out of my days so that I’m excitedly sharing the greatness of now, and not dwelling on my hay day of the past successes. I want my setback to be a learning setup for bigger and better success, not a cesspool blame game of what-went-wrong.

Yesterday is behind us. Last year is behind us. So are all of the years past that you can’t return to and fix. What happened has happened. You don’t have a time machine to change things; and if you did, would you truly change every thing that happened in your past? Because you would have to in order to get your desired outcome, which means there’s a lot of great people and experiences you would miss out on all because you wanted to change one or more series in your life’s story.

Think of how much precious time you would then lose in the present and how that would then affect your future. There’s a better way to deal with our past….Learn from it and move forward. Stop dumping on your present, or that gift will no longer be your reality.

This isn’t a new year’s resolution, this is my daily affirmation. Focus on being, doing, and seeing all that God has called on me to be, do, and see today.

My self-talk for today….

Maybe it will help someone else who needs a loving push.

~Natasha

Copyright 2019. Natasha L. Foreman. All Rights Reserved.

Is Your Heart Healthy? Watch This Video

Interesting presentation on the 10 Warning Signs Your Heart Isn’t Working Properly. Please view and share with others. We all need to take care of our heart. We only have one and our body can’t function without it. Remember that prevention is better than a cure!

What Are We Doing With Canadian Detainees and Their Children?

Ah the title of this post got you didn’t it?

Did you ask yourself, “what Canadian detainees?” Most likely you did, because guess what we’re not talking about because we’re not hearing about it? Canadians who illegally cross the border into the US, what the US is doing to deter this activity, and how the US handles the separation of the adult detainee from their child.

I mean, we know what’s happening to Latin and Mexican immigrants who cross along the southern border of the US. We’re reading the horror stories of children being treated like little orphan Annie and Oliver Twist (sans the wealthy adopted dad and huge inheritance, respectively).

Imagine reading about US citizens being treated this way in Canada, Mexico, Central America, South America, or the Caribbean. Imagine reading about our children being forced to live months without the comfort of human touch—even from a sibling; no letter writing, no crying, and little to no phone contact with family for weeks and months. Visualize babies, toddlers, and other children who one moment were holding the hand of a parent, and in the next are forcibly placed in a van or bus and transported hundreds or thousands of miles away from their parents.

So how do the conditions of our Canadian detainees similar or different? When they illegally cross the border each day and enter the US, what is it like for them when I.C.E. detains them? Do their children get placed in camps with French names, to make them feel at ease? Spanish-speaking detainees are placed in camps named “Casa de Guadalupe” I suppose to provide the feeling of ‘home’. But it’s nothing like home and just because there’s hundreds of other kids there who speak your language and have similar and same skin tones as you, that doesn’t make them family. Besides, wouldn’t you be able to sleep in the same room with family? Wouldn’t you be able to hug family? But, youth detainees are separated from their siblings and just like the other detainees, siblings can’t touch—no hugging your sibling.

Yet politicians and greedy facility operators want to pitch this almost utopian environment of a “summer camp” experience, at some of the locations that are situated in areas where most middle class and wealthy families would consider the great summer camp experience.

Umm but excuse me—the privileges of summer camp include: family drops us off and picks us up when camp is over, we can write and call family whenever we want, when we’re homesick our family can come visit us or even take us home, we’re not restricted from touching and hugging other campers and definitely not restricted from doing so with family, we’re allowed to cry, and we’re allowed to opt out of participating in activities. Also, for the most part, food at summer camp doesn’t sound like or resemble prison food menu options.

Even our state and federal jails and prisons allow for visitation and mail service for the majority of their inmates.

Don’t blow smoke up my butt and tell me these traumatic experiences that these children are enduring are like summer camp.

Let I.C.E. snatch your child out of your comfy home, have them taken to one of these camps, and then ask your child “did it feel like summer camp or prison?

So back to our Canadian detainees, the families that illegally enter the US—what is their experience like when their caught crossing the border or swept up in a raid for living here illegally? Do their children stay in similar camps or the exact same camps as the Mexican and Latino children that we keep seeing and reading about? What are their experiences like? Is it not happening to them or is the media not covering their horror stories, much like they do when not covering instances of police misconduct and brutality towards other nationalities and racial groups as they do when pushing the hot button of mistreatment of African Americans by law enforcement?

I did read this article about the French woman who was jogging in Canada, visiting her mother, and didn’t realize she crossed the border into the US (because there’s no warning signs posted) and border patrol in Blaine, Washington detained her for two weeks. But looking at her photo and seeing her brown skin, it only reinforces the visual bias argument of why she was most likely stopped, questioned and detained. Interesting enough, her mother was able to visit her several times at the detention center—something that we don’t hear about in the thousands of other stories.

I mean of course, her story was a case of accidental border crossing. Out for a little exercise and before she knew it she had handcuffs on her. So maybe while she waited for the bureaucracy to catch up to her reality, border patrol felt it acceptable to allow her visitation from her mother. Wasn’t that decent of them.

Read this recent NY Times article and then let me know if this is an all-borders issue or just southern border issue. Share your insight, experiences, and opinions on this matter. Share your answers to my questions listed above.

I don’t know about you, but in my opinion, I think if the roles were reversed and these were Americans being handled and treated this same way, there would be even greater outrage and even faster action towards civil and dignified resolution.

Imagine what these weeks and months of damage and isolation from family could potentially do to a young mind. Yes, for the most part children are resilient. Some endure trauma but are never the same. And some break, to grow up to be the very thing society fears. What are we doing to these children we keep in jails we call camps? What are we teaching them? What are they learning about this place we call America, the land of the free and the home of the brave—built by and thriving because of immigrants?

Let’s talk.

~Natasha

Quote of The Day: Some People Are Like Clouds

some-people-are-like-clouds

I heard this quote on July 1st and it made me laugh. It’s true, in my opinion. Some people are just like clouds. They come in and cast a shadow over you, change the energy around you, cause uneasiness within you. But then when they leave–oh wow, everything seemingly regains light and life. There is indeed a shift when they arrive and when they leave.

Here’s the trick: identifying the ‘clouds’ in your world and then making the decision to either limit your contact with them or steer clear altogether.

We do have choices.

Even if one or more of the ‘clouds’ are related to you, and some of you may not want to admit it—but they are in your life, seemingly waiting to stir up a jaw-dropping storm just because they can—but you do have a choice as to how much time and energy that you invest in that person. Just as you have a choice with deciding the time and energy you invest in every person that you encounter.

You also have a choice as to how you respond to their presence.

You don’t have to give in to the pressure to feel negatively about your interaction with this ‘cloud’. You can choose whether to open the floodgates of toxic waters or to relish the sweet moments that you were enjoying before the ‘cloud’ appeared. I’m beginning to learn how to do the latter. It’s better for the mind, heart, body, spirit, and soul. It truly is.

Why on earth would I help a cloud rain upon me?

Grab an umbrella, poncho or rain coat, a hefty pair of rain boots, and get to splashing. Splash until the rain stops and the cloud clears. Don’t derail your day. Don’t be drained of the light that you were carrying around. Push past it and know that soon, just like all clouds, this one will be sliding off away from you.

Have fun with the smile that grows on your face as you think about this truth. The ‘cloud’ will wonder why it’s planted there all big and bold. Smile bigger.

If the ‘cloud’ is leaving, to never return, then smile bigger. Smile like the Kool-aid man in the commercials we loved years ago.

Your day and all days after will be brighter because that ‘cloud’ won’t be a part of it.

Now smile!

~Natasha

Sorry, This is Why You Can’t Be Friends With Your Exes

This topic comes up every now and again, and although I have my strong opinion about being friends with an ex, I always like to do research to see what others say and experience when it comes to compartmentalizing and realigning matters of the heart.

I found numerous articles, but the one that I’m sharing today is a great article to read, especially for those of you who have tried and failed to remain friends with exes. Personally, I choose not to remain friends, that’s a story for another time, but I do know that in rare cases it is possible.

I found Jen Kim’s article “Sorry, But This is Why You Can’t Be Friends with Your Ex” online at Psychology Today.

If you have a healthy, platonic friendship with clear and distinct boundaries, that never or rarely impacts your current love relationship—then this article isn’t for you.

It’s for the 80-plus percent of people out there (that’s my random unproven calculation by the way) who have struggled and failed, or are currently struggling to maintain connections with people they once thought they would love forever (or longer than a season of their favorite tv show).

— Read more on www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/valley-girl-brain/201211/sorry-is-why-you-can-t-be-friends-your-ex?amp

Please Don’t Call My Toddler a “Heartbreaker” — Coffee & Cacti

This is a beautifully written, very direct and eye-opening message from a mother who helps you to realize that your words do have power, that they can plant seeds of growth or destruction, and that we all must be mindful of the roles that we play in the raising up of generations of babies and young children. Everyone should read, digest, and share this message. Thank you to Coffee & Cacti for taking the time to put into words a call to action to stop the sexism that has ran rampant for far too long!

~Natasha [The Paradigm Life]

Please Don’t Call My Toddler a “Heartbreaker”

Please don’t call my toddler son a heartbreaker. Or a ladies man. Or a lady killer. Or say “watch out girls!” Or make comments about him flirting with you, when he’s just smiling. Or make any other comments about his future sexuality that is far, far from being developed. I know you mean well. I […]

via Please Don’t Call My Toddler a “Heartbreaker” — Coffee & Cacti

They Call Her “Mother of The Nation”

Beloved…

“Mother of the Nation”…

Nomzamo Winifred Zanyiwe Madikizela Mandela…the western world knows as Ms. Winnie Mandela, has transitioned from her earthly body today at the age of 81.

Ms. Mandela, may you live eternally in peace.

May other women, both young and more seasoned pick up your torch, stand strong and courageously, determined to never give up or give in until freedom and equity is fully and truly achieved in every sense of their meanings.

Ms. Mandela was and is a force to be reckoned with, that propaganda machines tried to destroy, but failed to do.

Women are to be seen and only heard when called on to speak, and only allowed to say what is deemed respectable and respectful by man. And Black women have less rights than that, especially during the apartheid-era in South Africa.

Some of the culprits have even come forward and admitted their roles and explained that they had to do it to keep her from growing in power and influence; they couldn’t afford having this woman convince her then-husband, Nelson Mandela, to do and say the bold things that would’ve elevated all of South Africa to a status equal to those nations that had colonized and controlled it; they couldn’t risk the domino effect it would create throughout the African continent.

So the propaganda machine worked instead on a strategy of divide and conquer.

They divided the Mandela family.

They divided Black leadership.

They divided the ANC.

They divided a nation.

They almost turned the world against Ms. Mandela.

Almost.

Propaganda machines are fueled by and rely upon the ignorant and uninformed.

However, with every conspiracy there are always the enlightened who you will never fall for the trick and never will convert.

Those of us who see clearly the deception, smoke and mirrors, and the games, also saw the plot against Ms. Mandela.

Nomzamo Winifred Zanyiwe Madikizela Mandela, we will continue to speak up, speak out, act timely, hold accountable, and demand that all of God’s people live and die with dignity, with the same resources, advantages, and opportunities as those who once and still do oppress them.

You fought an amazing fight Ms. Mandela. You can now rest and watch over your beloved nation. đź’—

Here is a snippet of a nice tribute that ABC News created for Ms. Mandela: https://twitter.com/abc/status/980870784833945602?s=21

~Natasha

Copyright 2018. Natasha Foreman Bryant. The Paradigm Life.