Natasha’s Quote of the Day: Devil’s Advocate 4.23.12

“No longer will I play the ‘devil’s advocate’ in any situation. Why on Earth, in Heaven or even in hell would I want to advocate for the enemy, think or speak like the enemy, or do something that the enemy would want me to do? I am a servant and ambassador for God, period. I serve no other role. I will think and speak no other way. I will do no other thing. I am an advocate for love, peace, joy, happiness, kindness, strength, grace, patience, forgiveness, dignity, truth, and the Light within. All of that negative stuff, the enemy can keep.” – Natasha L. Foreman

Copyright 2012. Natasha L. Foreman. All Rights Reserved.

Natasha’s Thought of the Day: Love of Self and Others

By Natasha L. Foreman, MBA

First you have to know how to identify love and know how to love one’s self, if not you can’t fully or authentically love another person.

Love is not defined by or limited to material possessions, to superficial routines and traditions, or even just saying the words, “I love you.”

Love goes beyond treating someone how you want to be treated. You should treat people the way you would want them to treat the person you love most.

Love is, well heck, love is perfectly defined and described in
1 Corinthians 13:4-13

That IS love. If you aren’t practicing and giving that type of love every single day, then you aren’t experiencing love, you aren’t being loving, and you have your work cut out for you!

Let’s ALL get to work!

Copyright 2012. Natasha L. Foreman. All Rights Reserved.

One Year Later: The Impact of HB 200 on Human Trafficking in Georgia

By Natasha L. Foreman, MBA

It is an honor and privilege to pass on this invitation from Georgia Women for a Change, who request the pleasure of your company for a Reception and Conversation

“One Year Later: The Impact of HB 200 on Human Trafficking in Georgia”

According to their invitation, “A panel of experts from the US Attorney’s Office, the GBI, the Dekalb District Attorney’s Office and programs serving victims will tell us what has changed since the Governor signed this historic legislation.”

Following this panel discussion, Sen. Renee Unterman, Rep. Buzz Brockway and Rep. Edward Lindsey will briefly describe where we go from here.

Join Georgia Women for Change and others who are determined to end human trafficking in Georgia, and worldwide.

Date: Thursday, May 3

Time: 5:30 – 7:30 pm

Location: King & Spalding
1180 Peachtree St., Atlanta 30309

R.S.V.P. rsvp@gwomen.org

Complimentary Valet Parking or self park for $16

Georgia Women for Change thanked King & Spalding and LexisNexis for making this event possible.

I thank all of them for caring enough to bring this issue to light so that others could actively participate in protecting women and children everywhere!

Copyright 2012. Natasha L. Foreman. Some Rights Reserved.

Georgia Women for a Change ~ P.O. Box 55553, Atlanta, GA 30308 ~ 404.875.8184 ~

Natasha’s Thought of the Day: Another Perspective on Loss

By Natasha L. Foreman, MB

In life we have loss. Some things lost naturally and some taken away. Now let me be clear this article is not addressing loss due to physical death; that is altogether a separate article. I’m referring to things we buy, trade, apply for or discard, and yes, even possibly (ending) relationships.

We try to protect ourselves from loss by natural disaster and even the disaster of theft, but sometimes we find that what we appreciated, valued and loved is now gone.

It hurts but it happens; how we deal with it can alter our life considerably.

Perceived or actual theft can really chap your hide. There will always be someone who wants what you have.

They’re not willing to work to get there own; they would rather take what they didn’t earn.

It’s easier that way.

No different than someone not being satisfied with what they have and are fixated on getting what they perceive to be better; a quickness to discard old for new.

We do it with phones, gadgets, cars, televisions, clothes, jewelry accessories, jobs, and yes even people.

We’re always looking for better and then trying to find something wrong with what we have so we can swap them out. Sound familiar?

Many people have no commitment to be committed, and feel no obligation to always be dignified and respectful. So people take what they want, use what they want, discard what they no longer want, and the only person who cares is the person who has experienced the loss—the person discarded or blindsided by theft.

But understand that no one can truly take what’s rightfully yours. I know it sounds like a load of hogwash, but it’s true.

If it can be taken to never be returned then it wasn’t meant for you to have for the rest (or most) of your life.

If it’s yours then it won’t be moved; or if taken, then it will be recovered.

Think of a stolen car that is recovered versus one that the owner never sees again. You have the opportunity to reclaim what’s yours or position yourself to get something else, possibly even better.

In the case of love and the people we love, if they leave out of desire for ‘better’ through total pursuit of their own, or by the luring of another–if they leave you then they were only yours for the time you had them. A reason or a season, but not a lifetime.

If they felt you weren’t good enough then guess what? They helped you by leaving because now you are free to have something else– something better, with a greater reward. They have freed you to live the life you are expected to lead.

We should never be dismayed for long, worry too much, or question repeatedly the why or how, for life should be seen as an investment in experiences and lessons learned with a return on the investment being wisdom.

This is how I deal with loss. I break it down as I go through my healing process. I look at it even before its happened.

I ask myself, “if this thing/person is with me for less time than I would hope for, am I okay with that, and what can/will I do to cope with and heal from the loss?” I’ve ‘lost’ enough in life to do an emotional risk assessment for potential ‘loss’. I also ask myself, “if this was damaged, lost or stolen next week, how devastated would I be?” If my answers are negative then I need to reconsider making that purchase.

This emotional-attachment assessment helps on many levels.

In life it shouldn’t be about trying to hold on to anything, it’s valuing it while you have it and knowing you are strong enough to thrive even if it’s gone. Most importantly, you have to remember that you can’t take it with you when you pass away.

So maybe you lost your car, jewelry, business, house, or job, and yes, maybe even the person you thought was the love of your life (but they thought differently) —think of all of the possibilities that can come your way.

As one door closes another one is bound to open. Keep the faith. Keep trusting and believing that as Pastor Bryan Crute says, “your best and brightest days are still ahead!”

Copyright 2012. Natasha L. Foreman. All Rights Reserved.

Black Men and Suicide

By Natasha L. Foreman, MBA

I just read a very interesting article that was published last month online by Dr. O about Black men and suicide.

There was an emotional video that accompanied it, showing the dramatized story of one young man who contemplated suicide because he thought life’s pressures were too much, and that the dream path his mother encouraged him to follow (education and career) would be easier to attain, and brightly lit, when his perception of his reality was completely different.

I don’t want to spoil it for you, you have to watch it for yourself and share with others.

This short film clip and Dr. O’s article touches on a poignant fact that mental health professionals attempt to get all of us to learn and understand; that although we may be products of our parents, we are not them.

So no matter if they abandoned us, committed suicide, were/are abusive or addicts, WE don’t have to follow their paths or the decisions they made. But many people, including Black men struggle with this (especially when outside forces are telling them the opposite) and instead fall deeper into their depression.

According to Dr. Sherry Molock, Psychology Professor at Howard University in Washington, D.C. and Director of Clinical Training for the University’s Psychology Department, poverty and unemployment contribute to the increase of suicide among Black men. Dr. Molock was quoted as saying, “Some of the men I work with have no hope for the future; they simply live day by day.”

To add to this point, Dr. O quoted
Reverend Cecil L. Murray, former pastor of First African Methodist Episcopal Church of Los Angeles as saying, “Despair is increasing, and that despair is economic, political, educational, and social.”

Reverend Murray also spoke of the broken home in the Black community and that young adult males are, “left without a hands-on mentor. Also recall that the divorce rate is 50%; the rate of birth out of wedlock approaches 75% in impoverished communities, so the wheel of difficulty keeps spinning more rapidly.”

Dr. O posed six theories that he presented for this dilemma:

1. Learned Helplessness (major theory of depression)

2. Primitive Rage and Abandonment Anger (abandoned by either one or both parents so males give up on life)

3. Financial Stress (no jobs for uneducated Black men; which means you can’t provide for yourself or your family)

4. Unresolved Early Childhood Abuse (unresolved verbal, emotional, physical, and/or sexual abuse endured by males and/or females)

5. Chronic Medical Problems
(no health insurance means no regular check ups, which means a higher probability of disease)

6. Chronic Mental Health Problems (no health insurance means no access to professionals who can evaluate and treat mental health issues including bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, etc.)

Dr. O goes into further detail what these six theories mean exactly, and then goes further into the exploration of suicide prevention, intervention, and five points to ponder about depression and suicide.

To read the article in its entirety and to view the video visit:

http://www.askdro.com/2012/03/black-men-and-suicide-enough-said/

Please share this post with others you know; depression, suicide, abuse, and other issues are considered taboo in the Black community, so many of us refuse to discuss the things that haunt and sometimes kill us.

Copyright 2012. Natasha L. Foreman. Some Rights Reserved.